I haven’t watched soap operas in full episodes since high school. Specifically, Days of Our Lives. Before Tivo and DVRing, we had to – can you believe this – TAPE something on tv if you were going to miss it when it was aired. Thankfully, for those who live in 2009, you can watch whatever you want, whenever you want. Nick and I don’t have cable, a flatscreen, or fancy shmancy anything. We just watch basic tv channels and go with the flow of life. We’re content and happy (and cheap) like that.
So, it was quite the rare day today that I – in between jobs and have some free time – got to sit my pregnant butt down and just relax. After a hectic weekend of company, hosting, dinners, and sun, I felt the need – physically and emotionally – to just chill. And chill I did.
Within 25 minutes of watching, I got caught up on Days and started wondering how Nick was doing on his mission trip. Since he doesn’t have phone reception, we’re unable to communicate this week. So you can imagine my surprise when I hear my phone buzz with the receipt of a text message. From Nick, it says he has reception for one hour a day and to text updates. Knowing he meant updates about life and not Days of Our Lives, I tried to tell him in 160 characters that I missed him and all is well with me and Baby.
Out of nowhere, the flood gates break and I’m crying.
My sister, who is kindly staying with me this week to keep me company in the big house while I’m alone, sighs and rolls her eyes at me, “Oh, get a grip!”
I frown at her and blame it on pregnancy hormones.
In addition to missing his overall presence and love…Who’s going to beg me to make popcorn at 10 o’clock at night? Who’s going to leave granola bar wrappers on the counter? Who’s going to mow the grass? Who’s going to make me laugh right before I fall asleep? Who’s going to listen and actually care about my latest rant on life and social justice?
Sometimes when our beloved temporarily vanishes from our lives, it gives us the clarity to recognize the million and one ways they bring joy in the details of daily co-habitation, everyday love. Nick is just one of those people who is just too easy to love and separation can be difficult. Especially when this baby inside me is making me weepy by just watching Days of Our Lives.